Cocoon

I have a habit of waiting until things are perfect. The problem is they never will be Its fine to strive towards perfection, but not at the cost of waiting or holding myself back.

Lately I've noticed I have been pulling back into myself . There is less of a desire to go clubbing or to bars. At first I thought it might be just be a temporary shift or change in attitude and mood. Maybe it was being tired or lazy. I would purposefully back away and stay at home or avoid nitelife slowly burying myself into a cocoon. And that is it right there.

When I write I sometimes find myself doing the same thing. I will hit a certain spot, then back away and avoid it for a while. It seems like I'm just stuck at first. But I'm seeing that I will know what I need to write and where it need to go,l but It doesn't feel just right just yet, so instead of getting something down, I stop, and bury myself away. I'm waiting for, or building up to "That perfect moment"

Fuckin butterfly shit!

But that is it, isn't it. I'm walling myself in until I reach that perfection that's in my head. While its not all waiting around, there is work on my part, it is still hiding away and closing myself off.